Look inwards then step out...

 

Are you connecting...

with more people or with people more? 

As a leader, which do you do?

Technology has definitely enabled more connections and connectivity but  I can't help but wonder if leaders are using technology effectively or conversely if they are effective in using it.

#WorkingFromHome

Working from home is not the preferred way of working - especially when your children are home from school.

It helps when everyone is helping...

Your ASK...

...determines what you get.

Step out and step up

Read more here: Step out and step up

#WorkingAtHomeTip

Tomorrow will be the first day some of us will start working from home fully...so decided to share a tip that you might find helpful. #WorkingAtHomeTip

Who are you mentoring?

Many people think that they cannot be mentors. Nothing is further from the truth. Each one of us has something to give. In giving that, we get more to give more...

What's your mindset?

Happy New Year!!! As we step into this leap year, leap and have a growth mindset

Shared by Frédérick Audet on Facebook

"You should talk to..."

Last year, I was talking to someone about some career matters and decisions. The person, "wisely", suggested that I talk to someone else - to get more information and possible guidance.

When I finally met the person, we had a good conversation that resulted in an interesting discovery. The more we talked, the more obvious it became that the person needed me more than I did. Instead of pulling back, I switched gears to my purpose in life which is to help others be their best selves.

Over a couple months, when I could, I was available as a mentor and a life coach. It was amazing all that I learned from this experience. Summing it up, to empower another person, you need to care.





To empower another person, it is important to make a Connection.
Making a real connection starts from your inside out. Over the years, I've found that my heart, head and hands have to be connected and aligned when relating to others. And the more connected they are, the more mutually-beneficial those relationships have been.







For external connection to exist, one has to be Approachable. Synonyms include: frank, accessible, communicative and easy to talk to. To be effective, you need to be a friendly face who is available, ready and easy to talk to. There's no value in being available to talk to if you are not ready or easy to talk to etc.   

The connection and approachability need to be unpinned by the Real you. Another and more common synonym for "real" is "authenticity" and all about being yourself. I like the way Edwin Elliot put the importance of authenticity: "By being yourself, you put something wonderful in the world that was not there before." When you do that, you empower others to do the same. 








Leaders have been encouraged to develop Emotional Intelligence as a way to better connect with others. Whether or not you accept it, we are all first emotional beings before we are intellectual beings. It's just that some family upbringing and societal norms suppress our emotional side and highlight our intellectual side.  Everyone, not just leaders, has to be emotionally intelligence. It is amazing how you can show true are with it. 

Looking back, these 4 attributes helped me in relating with and empowering very many people.

If you or someone you know needs CARE or needs to develop CARE, contact me for coaching via LinkedIn or email - 1st ½ hour will be free...

Passion is not enough

...it must be supported by action.

This topic has been on my mind for several years and I've kept putting it off because I did not quite have the content. Now, I have more to say (and show) about this.

As you may know, I'm passionate about a lot of things. For instance, I really enjoy writing creatively and at my husband's instance - more like insistence, I started on and recently finished and published my first book: "101 Quips & Quotes…that will charge and change your life" 

In fact now, I even run Creative Writing Coaching Workshops.

Passion is a great starting point...not an ending point otherwise you will never fulfill your potential.

As we start the last quarter of this year, I encourage and actually challenge you to think deeply about what you're passionate about and then ask yourself, "What have I done/can I do about it?"

You can take action now to see your passion furthered and your potential fulfilled. 

If you need "help", take action, book one or more of our services by clicking here.

Eagle or

"Ego-ed"?

I've been wanting to write and publish this piece in my Pastoral* blog but the piece didn't flow until I heard the Lord say "This is a topic for your Professional blog" i.e. this one, not the Pastoral or Personal** one and then elements came together. So here we go...

Who wants change? Who would change?

A few weeks ago I saw this version of the story of Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody titled "Who wants change?*

Once there were four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, Nobody who wanted change.

So, Everybody said "I want change".

Somebody said "If only Anybody would start to change, I will join."

But Nobody said "I will change."

Finally Everybody stayed same, blaming Somebody for waiting for Anybody to start changing. So, Nobody changed.

I smiled after reading it and then couldn't help but wonder "who" determines "who" changes - including why, when, and how. In fact, some of us want everyone around us to change or to do the heavy-lifting and make change easier for us.

Without a doubt, change is a constant thing in life and it's exciting when you have the right perspective about it. In fact, you can be the "Change Leader" - the one who sets the example for others to follow. As a Change Leader, you're more in control than when you just let change happen to you.

“Changes are inevitable and not always controllable. What can be controlled is how you manage, react to and work through the change process.”  ~ Kelly A. Morgan

The bottom line is that Change management is a key leadership skill best exemplified by how you embrace and manage your own change. 

Happy to have a chat with you if you want to discuss this further; book a time.

Reference:
* Who wants change?

C.U.P.- capacity

A few weeks ago, thinking about people who say that they are "calm under pressure", my attention was drawn to the first letter of each word...which spells "CUP".

We all know what a cup is. This knowledge led me to wonder what the overall CUP - capacity of those who are calm under pressure is.

Cups come in different sizes...and pressure comes with different levels of intensity hence your C.U.P. - capacity is a determinant for handling pressure successfully.

Here are 3 things I do to cope which have helped me increase my C.U.P. - capacity:

1. Consider what my options are and the possible outcomes would be. In other words, what would happen if I do nothing or do something? What if I do something which is not the right thing?
2. Open myself to understand the (potential) interests of and (possible) impact on the other people involved. Understanding these help me determine if I need to reach out to others for support or not. It also helps me assess my options.
3. Pace myself this includes my words and actions because pressure always passes. In pacing myself, I focus on distinguishing my emotions from the actual situation as there are times that our emotions exaggerate the impact of the situation.
4. Ensure that I maintain positive thoughts and do my best to arrive at a future-focused solution. It is important to focus on what will matter about the situation in 6 hours, 6 days, 6 weeks, 6 months, 6 years or even 6 decades from today.

One thing to remember about your C.U.P.-capacity is that if you tip over, what's in you will spill out. So long before pressure comes is the time to build your C.U.P.-capacity.

I'd be interested in hearing how you manage your C.U.P. - capacity.

Interested?

A few months ago as we were preparing to head out for a morning walk, my husband started offering me a gadget to assist me. He then said, "If you are going to be doing this, you need to invest in some things." I fully agree(d) with him.

As we walked, the thought that crossed my mind was "Interest inspires investment!"

What's your balance?

We're now right into summer time...a time when some people slow down and when some don't.

The workplace is riddled with material and meetings about work-life balance.

Work-life balance means different things to different people. The important thing is that without life, you cannot work. So ensure that you take care to live* not just work.

*See post on "I live"

It's all up to you...

Over the years, and more recently when coaching my clients, I have heard people incessantly compare themselves to others - in various areas of life. Well, I have even caught myself doing that!

The point of life is that everyone has a unique "life-map", such that even identical twins cannot have identical lives. There is no basis for comparison. Comparison is a total waste of time because it makes you expend energy competing with others who are steadily improving themselves.

If you must compare yourself to and compete with anyone else, compare yourself to yourself - daily.

Who you are, or who you are not is all up to you. You have control over who you are and who you become. Look in the "mirror" and make the necessary adjustments to your attributes and attitudes.

Action attracts attention

It is easy to complain that nothing (good) comes your way - in your career and life. The question I have for such people is what are you doing? Of course it is easier to complain than to take action however complaining does not reduce or remove the "dis-ease" (or unease, if you prefer).

One good answer I have heard to that question is:
"I'm taking baby steps." Actually, it is a great answer because "baby steps" are steps. And every step is usually a set of "Specific Tasks Evidencing Progress" - and progress is what you need to move from where you are currently (that you don't want to and should not be) to where you should be (and want to be).

The other thing about taking baby steps is that it is always forward-focussed. No matter how many times a toddler falls, he/she gets up and keeps moving. I am yet to see the toddler that gives up on walking because he/she fell one too many times - and I'm sure I will never see any such toddler. Or have you?

The third thing is that "action attracts attention and assistance." When a toddler starts trying to and actually starts walking - baby steps - his/her parents (or grandparents and/or other caregivers) spring into action. They either take their baby-proofing to the next level and/or deliberately clear areas to make it easier and safer for the toddler to walk. You may have done this and/or noticed it. The toddler's action has attracted attention and assistance.

Similarly, when we spring into action to improve or change our circumstances rather than sit and moan about them, people around us pay attention and some step up to assist us (pun intended).

If you want others to step up to assist you, step out - even with baby steps because action attracts attention and assistance. If you feel stuck, take action and contact a coach it's an excellent baby step.

Learnings from my sunglasses...

A few months ago, as I put on one of my favourite sunglasses I smiled as I looked at the "screwstopper" on the left side.

Mum-powered

I'm Mum-powered!

My Mum (of blessed memory) always had something to counter every "I can't". Such that decades after I last heard her words, I'm very confident because my Mum said I could...

Today, I'm celebrating every Mother and Mother-figure. You are blessings to many of us on so many levels. Thank you for who you are and all you do.

"I live"...

...I mean "I leave."