In being candid, don't forget to be...

...kind

Be a PAL

A lot of us aspire to become leaders and that is great. However, too many people wrongly assume that a manager or supervisor is a leader, and that can't be further from the truth. There are many differences between Managers and Leaders, but these three stand out for me:

Managers are process-focussed while Leaders are people-focussed. One of my former managers - who's a leader indeed once told me "take care of your people and they'll take care of the work." I've found that to be true over and over again.

 Managers instruct while Leaders inspire - Leaders are visionary and inspire others to follow that vision while Managers are good at instructing people on what to do in order for the vision to be a reality. Managers work within a circle of power while Leaders operate with spheres of influence.

Being a manager is a career while leadership is a calling - the first time I read this it made sense and lined up with something I've always believed which is that the best way to get the best out of others (especially your reports) is to be a PAL (Passionate Authentic Leader). 

When you are a PAL, you care for people and want what is best for them. In other words, your compassion for people is your passion. That passion keeps you in check so you are authentic at all times - telling them the truth on what they do well and what they can do better  that authenticity breeds trust and makes you relatable. Being real and relatable attracts others to you and they want to follow you...

Watch the effect of your EFFECT...

Have you noticed that a lot of people mix up their use of "affect" and "effect"? They are actually 2 sides of the same word...affect is a verb while effect is noun. For this piece, I'll focus on effect because effects affect a lot. Let's start with the meaning of "effect": a "result: a change or changed state occurring as a direct result of action by somebody or something else"* or "power to influence: success in bringing about a change in somebody or something, or the ability to achieve this."* There are 6 things we need to watch closely - because they have a lasting effect on us and intentionally or unintentionally affect others too:

Ladder lessons...

A lot of us aspire to climb the corporate ladder and there's nothing wrong with that. There just a few things we need to learn about the ladder.

The first thing about climbing is that it has to start with a decision - your decision. As supportive as my husband has been and with all he's said and done to empower, the decision has still remained with me whether to proceed or not. Andrew Carnegie rightly said "You cannot push anyone up the ladder unless he (she) is willing to climb."

2nd lesson: Doing is required. Ladders are stationary and cannot climb people - you know like our children climb us when they want to be carried or just played with. Just as no one can push you up the ladder, you need to get your hands out of your pocket on to the ladder. For those who may have gotten to the top in an "elevator" (or lift) e.g. by a parent, it is important to remember that what got you there will not keep you there. Each person has a part to play in their continued success.

The 3rd lesson I've learned is that our dressing matters... There are multiple dimensions to dressing. I've written quite a bit about physical dressing so I'll focus on the emotional and social dressing this time. Zig Ziglar said: "You cannot climb the ladder of success dressed in the costume of failure." We all know what it means to be dressed for an occassion. I remember seeing a lady in her traditional outfit and children around asked "Auntie, are you going to church?"  Our mental and emotional make-up shows on the outside. If one feels like a failure, because they may have failed before, chances are that the person will act in fear like a failure and succeed in failing. We need to address and dress our minds to know that the fact that one has failed (one or more times) doesn't make the person a failure. Learn from the failure(s) and move on...

Destination is the 4th lesson. Before you start climbing and as you climb, you need to have a fair idea of where you want to end up. Otherwise, you may spend (many) years in school or at job and never find fulfillment because you don't know where you're headed. Learn from the wisest man who ever lived -
⁵ Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding. ⁶ In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths.*
Because "we can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps."**
The bottom line is that:
"The Lord shows us how we should live,  and he is pleased when he sees people living that way."*** So when you follow God's guidance, step by step, your ladder will always be leaning on the right building...and you'll be pleased with your destination.

Sources:
* Prov 3:5-6 (Amplified)
** Prov 16:9 (NLT)
***Ps 37:23 (ERV)

Leading from behind...

When you hear about leadership, most times it's about being a visible and vocal "head" of a team. Lots of leaders want to be seen and take the credit for the good work their team members produce. however, the more I think about my leadership journey, the more I want to lead from behind.

Jack Welch the former Chairman and CEO of General Electric said:

Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself.

When you become a leader, success is all about growing others.

Growing others is something that happens mostly "in the dark"  - just as seeds develop roots in the soil where it's dark. It also takes a lot of patience. Imagine what would happen if you plant then dig up the seed everyday to check if it's growing? It will die before it takes root. So growing or developing others does not need to be broadcast to others and requires quite a bit of patience. The growth will show from the quality of fruit your team members produce. 

Nelson Mandela's advice is one every leader should take to heart:
"It is better to lead from behind and to put others in front, especially when you celebrate victory when nice things occur. You take the front line when there is danger. Then people will appreciate your leadership."

Leading from behind for me is all about encouraging others to discover & express their full potential and also be there (behind them) to have their back i.e. provide cover.

It will be nice to hear from you what you think about "Leading from behind..." You can send me an email: empoweredwomenexcel@gmail.com or comment on this post.

Learn from birds...

I started thinking about birds - not just the eagle - and started looking for quotes that speak to me. Here are a few and my comments are in blue font.

 

Why do birds sing in the morning?

It's the triumphant shout:

"We got through another night!"

Enid Bagnold

Where you've been or what you've been through is not as important as where you're headed. Whatever your situation, always have a song in your heart...it will lift you.

 

Be like the bird in flight . . . pausing a while on boughs too slight, feels them give way beneath her, yet sings knowing yet, that she has wings.

Victor Marie Hugo

 

Each bird must sing with his own throat.

Henrik Ibsen

God gives every bird its food, but he does not throw it into the nest.

Josiah Gilbert Holland

 

Use the talents you possess - for the woods would be a very silent place if no birds sang except for the best.

Henry Van Dyke

 

You cannot fly like an eagle with the wings of a wren. ~ William Henry Hudson

 

Self-development is key to advancement; to get to the next level, invest in yourself. 

Know-it-all?

A few weeks ago, my colleague and I were chatting and she was talking about the fact that there are some things are brought to her attention or meetings she's invited to where she knows little or nothing about the subject matter.

I smiled and said that's fine because I "thrive" in not knowing it all. Now that's not to say that I don't know anything...I know some things but I don't know everything. I believe that not knowing it all gives one (me) room to grow.

On the other hand, while it's ok not to know everything I believe that it is very important to know what you do know well.

In professional & personal circles, people have more respect for those who "know-it-well" than those who carry around as if they know-it-all.

In the corporate world, there's quite a bit of talk about specializing in a body of knowledge to become a Subject Matter Expert (SME) or a Technical Authority (TA). Did you know that those acronyms also stand for "Small & Medium Enterprises" and "Turn-Around" respectively? Small & Medium Enterprises aspire to get bigger and Turn-Arounds are meant to improve the performance of the equipment - these are pointers to the fact that it's better to know-it-well and keep learning more, growing and getting better as against capping your willingness & ability to learn. Be a know-it-well not a know-it-all.